#! /bin/bash
clear #Clean screen for better vision
# Variable declaration
negacion="NOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!"
sujeto="fede"
eli=psicobabblecrapblablabla-howdoesitmakeyoufeelblablablayourmothersfaultblabla
#First contact attempt
cd /home/"$sujeto"/MIND
for i in *.thoughts; do
cat $i | sed -e 's/murderous thoughts/happy gummy bear thoughts/'
chmod 777 $sujeto # let's try to make him accesible to enyone
read mood
case "$mood" in
"gun" | "GUN" ) # subject might be Case Sensitive
echo $negacion "Listen to me" $sujeto "Dont do it!"
# You have to reafirm by saying his name often
echo $sujeto "S T E P A W A Y F R O M THE G U N" $sujeto
echo $eli
exit 1
;;
"window ledge" | "WINDOW LEDGE")
echo $negacion "DON'T JUMP" $sujeto
echo $sujeto "but if you do, try to miss my car buddy, be pal"
echo $sujeto "Remember your family needs you" #try even if <> true
echo $eli
exit 1
;;
"hostage" | "HOSTAGE" )
echo $negacion $sujeto
echo $sujeto "LET THAT GIRL GO!" #They always grab a girl
echo $sujeto "DONT PULL THAT TRIGGER"
read reaction
case "$reaction" in
"SHOOTS" | "WON'T LET GO" | "ALIENATED" | "GONE" )
echo " "
proceso=`eval ps ax |sed -n '/"$sujeto"/p' | awk '{print $1}'`
kill -9 $proceso # KILL HIM
echo "PRESS RELEASE"
echo "I knew that guy..."
echo "He was a loner..."
;;
"DROPS GUN" | "CRY" | "PEES ON HIMSELF")
echo $eli
;;
esac
"standoff with police" | "STANDOFF WITH POLICE")
chown $sujeto:$sujeto root # Let the system take care of him
exit 0
;;
"already made a mess" | "ALREADY MADE A MESS")
echo "PRESS RELEASE"
echo "I knew that guy... yes, he was a loner"
exit 1
;;
esac
# IF ALL ELSE FAILS
echo "YES " $sujeto "ELI HAS A NICK END HE WANTS TO CHAT WITH YOU"
exit 0
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Script cortesia de Franknstein Barbie
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